Chapter 6
The afternoon sun breaks through your window. Your blackout curtains must have been left open while you slept. How inconvenient. At least you can handle it. Your loving boyfriend would probably freak if he were awake right now. You'd like to try and get up to close them, but he's currently sleeping right next to you, and you're not sure you can get to it without waking him up.
You decide to suffer the sunlight for a little while you contemplate the troll lying next to you. You don't often do this, thanks to the ridiculous amount of issues with intimacy you share, especially of a physical nature. When you both feel comfortable with it, however, it's nice to hold each other and fall asleep.
You treasure the few moments you get where Karkat's sensitivity shines through over the aggressive and hostile wall he normally hides behind. They happen more often when the two of you are alone, but the moment another person is around, that's when the insults start popping back up. Of course, they still pop up when you're alone, because sometimes he very much needs to let you know how much of a grubshitting rumpusfuck you are.
Still, even when he's insulting you, you don't really let it get to you. The amount of filth pouring out of Karkat's mouth on a daily basis, while having become much less overflowing over the years, still streams so constantly that you've grown numb to it, often even considering it endearing. Sometimes it's even adorable, watching him standing there losing his shit and working himself into such a state of violence that he starts throwing random words together after running out of his more typical insults.
You feel him start to stir against you, and decide if he's already getting up, now might be the time to go get those curtains.
DAVE: morning babe
KARKAT: FUCK IT'S SO BRIGHT IN HERE WHAT THE SHIT.
DAVE: yeah i think we forgot to close the curtains again
There's perhaps a conversation the two of you need to have, but you can't bring yourself to have it at the moment. You don't particularly want to think about it, especially not having still really processed it, but you also don't really want to potentially argue with him so soon after waking up. You'd rather just admire him and enjoy some quality time together.
Or, you would, if he wasn't getting out of bed to presumably go find something to do. Oh well. You don't feel hungry, nor do you particularly feel like a cup of coffee yet. You may as well just find a way to busy yourself. You've been neglecting your beats lately, not having really felt in the mood to make any music. Too much is happening lately causing you stress and you can't really find the energy to be creative.
You feel like you should probably work through those feelings in the back of your head, but you're not particularly sure how to go about doing that. At least, not without a discussion and potential argument with Karkat, but as we've established you really don't feel up to that at the moment. There's got to be someone you can talk to though, right?
You sit down at your computer and open your favorite INSTANT MESSAGING CLIENT, scrolling through your expansive list of almost a dozen friends. Dirk? No, he's probably busy. He's not even online and, unlike June, you're fairly sure he doesn't ever appear offline. Roxy? No, you need advice, and you don't think they'll have any that'll be particularly helpful at the moment.
You don't particularly want to talk to Jade about any of this, nor do you particularly want to talk to Jane or Jake about, well, anything really if you're being honest. Terezi would probably grill you too much about this, and you're worried she's too close to the issue at hand to really feel like asking her. Kanaya's nice, but you haven't really ever gotten that close with her. That just leaves...
-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --
TG: god i cant believe im coming to you for advice again especially after what happened last time i took your advice but uhhh
TG: can i talk to you about smth
TT: You certainly can.
TT: Whether you will or won't is your choice, but you certainly can.
TG: yeah haha very funny
TG: im like dying of laughter as we speak
TG: my ass is currently workin its way off my body in response to how funny that was rose
TT: So how did things with June go?
TG: thats actually exactly what im tryin to talk to you about funny enough
TG: so uhh
TG: i asked her out on a double date
TT: Oh no.
TT: That was your first mistake, Strider.
TG: yeah i see that now
TG: what wise fuckin words lalonde
TT: I'm sorry, continue.
TG: so yeah i invited her and terezi over as like a double date thinkin itll be chill and comfy and not even remotely awkward at all
TG: then i got karkat to bug the shit out of terezi and get them arguing so i could like
TG: ask them to move to the other room so june and i could get a little alone time yknow
TG: well turns out
TG: june kinda freaked when i told her like hey i kinda really like you
TG: but then to make things worse
TG: my dumb ass noticed those two assholes stopped yelling at each other
TG: and when we went to go check on em
TG: what do i find but two trolls making out on my goddamn couch
TT: You're joking.
TG: not even dude like
TG: just goin right at it right there on the couch as if nobody was around
TT: I can't say this surprises me.
TG: fuckin really
TG: cause it sure shocked the fuck out of me
TT: I didn't say it wasn't shocking.
TT: Or that I would have expected it to happen.
TT: I'm just not surprised that, with the two of them alone in a room together, that's what they would end up doing.
TT: Or have you forgotten how they already sort of had a thing some time ago?
She brings up a good point.
TG: yeah but that was ages ago i didnt think theyd actually still have any like black feelings or whatever
TG: i kinda forgot in the moment otherwise i would have honestly just asked june out one on one and been up front like hey dude im kinda gay for you and all
TG: or whatever
TG: you know what i mean
TT: I take it this whole development upsets you?
TG: yeah kinda but like
TG: thats the weird thing
TG: i feel like it shouldnt
TT: You don't think it should bother you?
TG: i mean not like this
TG: like karkats a troll
TG: terezis a troll
TG: this is just troll stuff its what they do
TG: the whole quadrants thing like i get that
TG: this is a whole other quadrant than whatever we got so to them this is like normal
TG: so on some level i get it
TG: but it still feels weird and i still feel kinda upset and weirded out by it
TT: Well, in all fairness
TT: That's likely because it's certainly a strange thing to stumble across your partner unexpectedly snogging your best friend's partner.
TT: Sometimes.
TG: yeah fine ok youre right about that i guess
Does she have to put it so colorfully though? You're really not a fan of the mental image her words give you. Especially since you can't seem to chase it away, meaning you're now stuck here replaying the sight of Terezi on top of Karkat ad nauseam. Almost literally.
TT: I get the feeling there's more to this than just feeling uncomfortable with the sight in question.
TT: Did something else happen?
TG: yeah june got real pissed and kinda just fucked right out of the house
TG: then me and karkat talked about it for a bit
TG: we still gotta talk about it more later but we at least didnt argue about it
TG: ended on good terms
TG: i think
TT: That's good.
TG: idk i just
TG: i feel bad
TG: i feel like i shouldnt be upset but also i feel upset like
TG: idk
TT: You probably feel upset because it happened out of nowhere.
TT: Had you ever talked about this beforehand?
TG: i mean no
TT: If you'd talked about it beforehand, would you still be this upset about it?
Cutting right to the heart of the matter, isn't she?
TG: i guess not
TG: i mean this is clearly what we were leading up to like
TG: honestly this is even hypocritical of me cause like the dude was trying to set me up with june the whole time
TG: encouraging me to go after her
TG: talking about how he wasn't really insecure about our relationship and how he knew id still love him even if things went well with june
TG: goddamn im kind of an asshole
TT: Not really my choice of words, but if that's how you see yourself.
TT: It sounds like this is really the part that bothered you, not the fact they were making out on your couch.
TG: yeah i guess
TG: but also i guess its kinda my fault too since i could have like talked about this with him
TG: plus he says it just kinda happened so like i have even less reason to really be upset with him
TT: Do you believe him?
TG: yeah of course i do i know him
TG: do you think hes lying
TT: Dave, think about who we're talking about.
TT: This is Karkat.
TG: yeah youre right dude cant lie for shit hahaha
TG: alright well
TG: idk i think im feeling better about this
TG: even if i still cant stop thinkin about seeing the two of them like that
TT: Think of it this way.
TT: At least it's only troll/troll sloppy makeouts, and not troll/human sloppy makeouts.
TG: literally how does that make it any better
TG: dude both of us are gay as shit for a troll
TG: do you have any idea how many of those weve had
TT: Six.
TG: what
TG: what the fuck
TG: how did you
TG: ok nvm fuck that lets forget about all that and think about smth else hey guess what im gonna bounce and go talk to karkat about stuff
-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --
That was really not the most helpful conversation. Well, it was for a while, but it also kept filling your head with thoughts you really don't want to think about.
Still, you can't help but feel better about things now. You still wish you could have talked things out with Karkat before what happened last night, but in spite of that, you feel much less concerned with the idea of the two of them hooking up. In fact, now that the shock has worn away, thanks in part to the constant loop of their acts playing in your mind, you actually feel kind of happy that he might have filled one of his quadrants. Is that how he would describe it? You still can't wrap your head around the quadrants.
You should maybe just go talk to him about it.
Or, you could instead do something else first. Maybe there's someone else you should talk to about things. It seems that somebody else is online now, a sight so rare you ought not to pass up this opportunity.
-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --
TG: hey june
EB: oh hey dave!
TG: wow you sound upbeat
EB: really?
EB: i guess i am a little, i'm in kind of a good mood for once?
TG: thats pretty cool
TG: i just figured id bug you a bit and like apologize and shit for last night
TG: especially for making you think i was fuckin with you or whatever i genuinely was not trying to like
TG: for once i was actually being completely serious
TG: im just really really fuckin bad at it lol
EB: you don't need to apologize for anything, dave.
EB: it's alright.
EB: i think i was just having a 8it of a 8ad day yesterday?
EB: 8ut actually, after i left, terezi found me and helped me calm down.
EB: we kind of talked a8out what happened and apologized to each other and everything.
EB: i'm sorry i freaked out though!
TG: hey no its ok i get it
TG: trust me you didnt do anything wrong
TG: you got nothin to apologize for
TG: i mean except for being an adorkable goofball i guess youre kinda guilty of that
TG: i mean uhhh
TG: hey why dont we talk about something else
EB: hahahahah, whatever you say, daaaaaaaave. :P
Well, she at least doesn't seem to be upset with you, neither about last night nor about accidentally flirting with her just now. Maybe things will be alright. You start to wonder if perhaps all of this trouble could have been avoided if you'd just told her how you felt before any of this ever actually happened.
EB: oh, hey, actually.
EB: can we meet up somewhere tomorrow and hang out?
EB: just the two of us?
Huh?
She can't be suggesting what you think she's suggesting, is she?
TG: wait you mean like a date
EB: oh, yeah i guess actually, heheh.
EB: i didn't really think a8out that 8ut i guess it would kind of 8e some kind of d8?
TG: i mean yeah sure id be down
EB: i just feel like texting pro8a8ly isn't the 8est way to talk a8out this stuff, we should pro8a8ly talk a8out it in person.
TG: oh yeah i get that
TG: yeah
EB: there's a little coffeehouse near rose's place, we went there once together like
EB: a month ago?
TG: yeah i know the one she and i sometimes go and hang out there just to catch up
TG: yknow sibling stuff
EB: oh cool!
EB: it is kind of l8 now 8ut we should go tomorrow.
TG: hell yeah dope i like it ill see you there
EB: see you there!!!!!!!!
-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] --
Well that went well. You're glad she doesn't hate you, at least. The idea of talking about everything together makes you feel a little anxious, but given her good mood you're sure it'll go well. Hopefully. Maybe. Probably.
No. You're not going to psyche yourself out of it. It'll be fine. Worst case scenario you'll just remain friends, right? You resolve not to think about it until tomorrow, instead deciding to venture out into your living room to talk to somebody else about something else.
Karkat doesn't look particularly happy. Not that he ever really does, but he doesn't usually look this upset. He usually looks more grumpy than anything, but he almost looks worried now.
DAVE: hey babe you ok?
KARKAT: OH, YEAH, I'M FINE.
KARKAT: YOU?
DAVE: i just got done talking to june about some stuff
DAVE: turns out everythings cool after last night
KARKAT: OH.
KARKAT: GOOD.
KARKAT: I'M GLAD.
DAVE: hey
DAVE: can we talk about last night?
He shifts around uncomfortably in his spot on the couch, and the worried look on his face gets even more worried. He looks off into the distance, trying to avoid any eye contact with you.
KARKAT: I GUESS, IF YOU'RE GOING TO ANYWAYS.
DAVE: i think you two should keep seeing each other
KARKAT: WHAT?
His head jerks towards you with an incredulous look on his face.
DAVE: yeah like
DAVE: im sorry about last night
DAVE: im sorry i freaked out and didnt give you a solid answer or anything
DAVE: but i also kinda talked to rose about what happened
KARKAT: OH GREAT, NOW YOU'RE GOSSIPING ABOUT OUR PERSONAL LIFE?
DAVE: no dude not like that
DAVE: shes my sister plus shes not gonna tell anyone
KARKAT: NO, SHE'LL JUST FUCKING GRILL US ABOUT IT LATER AS PART OF SOME CEREBRAL ATTEMPT TO FUCK WITH THE BOTH OF US.
DAVE: ok maybe you have a point there but like
DAVE: she helped me figure some stuff out and like
DAVE: i was kinda being a hypocrite last night freaking out when you were literally in here trying to help me talk to june
DAVE: the only thing i guess i was really bothered by was how it just kinda shocked me i guess and kinda weirded me out but like
DAVE: not only is it really not my place to decide who you see or whatever
DAVE: fuck i forgot what i was gonna say next
DAVE: idk i think you should go for it
DAVE: fill up those quadrants babe
DAVE: hell explore your whole hate thing with harley too if you want dude i bet shes probably into that
Karkat muses over your words for a moment.
KARKAT: DAVE, CAN I GIVE YOU A HUG?
DAVE: hell yeah babe
You embrace, silently holding each other for some time. You don't often just sit there and hold each other like this. It always feels nice when you do, though. It reminds you of how much you care about each other, no matter what you might be going through.
KARKAT: I DON'T WANT TO GO THROUGH WITH IT UNLESS YOU'RE ACTUALLY OK WITH IT.
KARKAT: ARE YOU?
KARKAT: OR ARE YOU JUST SAYING YOU ARE TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER?
DAVE: no dude i mean it
DAVE: go hate kiss the absolute fuck outta that girl
KARKAT: SERIOUSLY?
KARKAT: WE'RE HAVING A FUCKING MOMENT AND THOSE ARE THE WORDS THAT COME OUT OF YOUR STUPID FUCKING IGNORANCE SHAFT.
KARKAT: I CANNOT BELIEVE WHAT I'M HEARING.
DAVE: idk dude youre the one talkin about my shaft
KARKAT: WHAT THE FUCK?
He pushes you away and you start giggling.
DAVE: i love you babe
KARKAT: UGHHH.
KARKAT: I LOVE YOU TOO.
KARKAT: ASSHOLE.
DAVE: wow babe you love my asshole thats kinda gay
KARKAT: AAAAAAAAAAAAA
KARKAT: THESE ARE WORDS THAT I AM HEARING.
KARKAT: WHY WON'T THEY GO AWAY.
KARKAT: YOU INSUFFERABLE FUCKING GLOBEFONDLER.
DAVE: dude youre the one that keeps giving me ammo for all these jokes
DAVE: if you dont want me to keep doing it then maybe stop talkin about my globes or whatever
KARKAT: JEGUS FUCKING SHIT I CAN'T WITH YOU.
DAVE: hahahahahaha
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